So I woke up all stoked to be doing a beginners aerobics class. Being a former dancer I thought it would be super easy but figured i should start slow as to not fuck anything with myself up.
So i ate my oatmeal and zoomed off to the club at 10:15. Class started at 10:30. Go figures I was the only one under the age of 40 but I didn't care. We get into the studio and it starts off with walking on the spot.
This is where i encountered my first problem.
My pants are too long and as a result the crotch sags hugely thus hindering walking on the spot adventures. My knees wouldn't go up too high b/c of the saggy crotchness. So there was that. Then the fact that I have no idea the co-ordination of how this aerobics instructor was going to about her things. I was arguably the most uncoordinated person there. I beleived that having several years of dance experience behind me that I would automatically be better than everyone else, but truth be told, when my limbs started flailing and I heard the instructor laugh into her mic as she caught a glimpse of me drowning in the middle of the workout floor through the mirror, that i was more than a little fucked.
Marching marching marching like damn soldiers. Lift your leg here, lose it there, flail your arm here, whack older woman next to you there. For safety's sake just stop moving and bend over and act out of breath to reduce the chance of injuring those around you when your limbs break off and fly all over the place. I was not - i repeat, not - out of breath in any capactiy, but it was my legs. THEY WERE ON FIRE. FIRE I TELLS YOU. How my thighs didn't just burn through my pants and set the place ablaze is beyond me, but when the marching refused to stop and my legs were burning beyond all withstandable pain, i had to 'get a drink' and beelined it to the door. I didn't want to offend the instructor but I just couldn't keep up. At one point i even got dizzy and felt like i would puke and that was the last straw. I guess instead of eating right before you should eat an hour before?
Or something to that effect...
As i was leaving the studio - dressed shamefully - i noticed that had i stayed just 2 seconds longer i would've made it to the 'cool down' yoga portion which would've been my saving grace. I fucking hate feeling lazy and i feel fat and really bad about myself today b/c i couldn't keep up.
But never fear, I will try again next week!!