My Double Lung Transplant

Sunday, August 26, 2007

Everyone's fat

Of all the horrible things in life people fear, it's not war, it's not divorce, it's not dying, and it's not being left soley to your own devices: it's being fat.

If you take a picture on a cloudy day, and it looks like a storm will come, you don't worry if a tornado will spontaneously spawn from the sky: you hope to God you don't look fat.

When you go to a funeral or a wedding, or back to school, you don't worry about if you have enough money for things or how you will get there: you hope to God you don't look fat.

And when you go on a new medication to help with an infection, or allergies, or anything (like transplant!) you hope to god you won't get fat!

I honestly beleive that the number 1 reason people don't take certain medications is b/c one of the side effects may be weight gain. God forbid you die - you can handle that - as long as you don't get fat you'll risk it. Who cares if you grow chin hair and develop spider veins on your face. If it keeps you from developing a triple chin you'll take it.

I sit here wrestling over recent picture of myself, as well as what my future holds. I have gained about 10 lbs b/c i needed to, and upon viewing these pictures i feel like i look a little chubby. I know i'm not; clearly i had to gain weight, but i guess since i am so used to looking gaunt and drawn-out a little flesh makes me feel like a tub. I am also worried that post-tx i will balloon up from the prednisone, which is very superficial of me. I know however that it will taper off so i will stop thinking about it...

For now.

Point being, everyone is fat. You may not actually be fat, but odds are you're feeling a little pudgy and your face looks slightly swollen, maybe you've packed on a few or stayed in the sun for too long.

I wish weight gain and fatness weren't such a feared thing in society. I'm sure there are worst things....

1 comment:

It's Her said...

There's a such thing as 'Diabulima' you know, where diabetics don't take insulin to lose weight. Crazy!!

You blow up in the immediate days post tx, but its all superficial (fluid weight) and then after that it's back to normal. Or so it was for me! :P

Have a good day 2day, enjoy sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep xx